What is God's Plan for My Life?

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amyjo88
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This is so much more important than it seems at first. Your belief on this changes your approach to life.

When I was a teenager, this seemed to come up a lot. What did God want me to do when I grew up? What school did He want me to go to? Who did He want me to marry?

It never sat well with me that there might be only one answer to those kinds of questions. I relate to Henry in the Ever After movie:

Henry: Do you really think there is only one perfect mate?
Leonardo da Vinci: As a matter of fact, I do.
Henry: Well then how can you be certain to find them? And if you do find them, are they really the one for you or do you only think they are? And what happens if the person you're supposed to be with never appears, or, or she does, but you're too distracted to notice?
Leonardo da Vinci: You learn to pay attention.
Henry: Then let's say God puts two people on Earth and they are lucky enough to find one another. But one of them gets hit by lightning. Well then what? Is that it? Or, perchance, you meet someone new and marry all over again. Is that the lady you're supposed to be with or was it the first? And if so, when the two of them were walking side by side were they both the one for you and you just happened to meet the first one first or, was the second one supposed to be first? And is everything just chance or are some things meant to be?
So, for the sake of discussion, I will use marriage as my example. And we will assume that we have free will, because if we don't have free will, this discussion is meaningless. (there is a different thread on free will, although it has just reached the 6 month mark….)

Is there 'the one' we are supposed to marry? I do not believe so.

Problems with this idea:

What if you marry the wrong one? How can you follow God's plan for your life? Do you settle for the second best plan or do you divorce and marry the “right” one? I don't think anyone would say that is reason enough for divorce.

If God has only one picked out, He has to orchestrate that meeting. And some people would have to be extremely obedient or they would miss their chance. I met woman who met her husband on a Mission Trip. What if she didn't go on that particular trip? What if the trip was to another place? What if he didn't interact with the group at all? Otherwise, God would need to take away our free will to guarentee that we meet “the one”. Even if you live in the same city, the meeting has to be orchestrated.

When does He choose “the one”? If it's been His plan since the beginning of time, that multiplies the chances of “the one” not even being born, much less meeting you.

Why do we have free will if God's plan is so specific? If we make one mistake are we really stuck with only second best? Or if someone else makes a mistake? Isn't our God bigger than that?

Scripture on marriage:

“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.” Proverbs 18:22
A wife, not THE wife. See also Proverbs 31:10

1 Corinthians 7 is very interesting. Paul recommends not marrying but says its ok to marry. We have a choice of whether to even get married.

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 2 Corinthians 6:14. What is the point of this verse if the is only “one” anyway? See also Leviticus 21:7

My conclusions:

When God speaks on marriage, He doesn't seem to spend much time on how you find your spouse. He talks mostly about what kind of spouse you are once you marry if you choose to marry. Google “Bible Verses on Marriage”.

Understanding this takes a HUGE amount of stress off. We can find visible assurance that we are marrying the right kind of person. Others can confirm our choice without having a direct sign from God.

And, not that God is limited, but aren't there more important things? I LOVE organizing, it's fair to call me a perfectionist. But I use up a LOT of time doing that. If there were souls at stake on Minecraft, is it worth tearing half the building down so the roof lines up?

This article points out, God gives us instruction on how to choose, not who to choose. http://www.titusinstitute.com/datingbib ... rriage.php

Another article: http://www.todayschristianwoman.com/jul ... s-one.html

So, put that into a larger context.

Maybe God doesn't have everyone's careers picked out. Maybe he is more concerned with what kind of employer or employee you are.

Maybe God doesn't have your college picked out. Maybe He is only concerned with what kind of student you are (not just as in grades, but in relationships during school).

Maybe we got distracted by the romanticism of fate.

I do believe there are exceptions. That sometimes God's call is very specific. However, I believe He has given us free will and hearts that feel and minds that think because He wants us to choose, not because He wants to see if anyone can hit it on the mark 100% of the time. Are there verses that prove me wrong that aren't about a specific person and therefore are actually an exception to the rule instead of evidence against it?

Thoughts?

If you disagree, how specific do you think God's will is? If He has your school, job, and spouse picked out, what else?

Does He have our kids picked out? How can He? What about kids born outside of marriage? Was it God's plan for their parents to sin? Or is it not sin? Surely no one would say God doesn't have a plan for them. Or, is a child outside of marriage a gift from God despite our rejection of Him?

K, so I guess I'll let others in on the conversation, there is so much more to say!
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ccgr
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Great post Amy!

Speaking from personal experience I call tell you that God will bless any marriage that invites him into it. I was engaged to a guy that was not a Christian. The church I attended refused to marry us and rightfully so. This brought fourth some big questions into our future like how we were going to raise our potential children and so forth. Ultimately our relationship ended and I married my current husband a little over a year later. By being equally yoked and sharing the same faith we are more united and blessed than my previous relationship. Could there be other potential husbands out there? Sure, there's a lot of people out there. Odds are in favor of being compatible with others. But I feel blessed regardless.
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I have always believed that as the Bible tells us, our days our numbered (Job 14:5-7) the day we were born and the day we die are all ready set. I also believe He has plans for us and He does direct us in that way(Jeremiah 29:11-13).
But I also know that we have a free will meaning God allows us to make choices in life. Will we still end up where He wants us ? Yes because we are doing everything according to His will in our life ((Eph 1:11, Rom 8:28))
That said we may not take the direct route instead we often stray from the path. When I first had to make life changes due to my migraines, I fought it all. Then I was told two of them were non curable. Soon I found when someone talked about their headaches that I could sympathize with them. And they felt here was someone that understands, some even tell me I could never handle them like you do.
I then have the chance to tell them it is only through God that I can handle it knowing that one day I will be healed either on earth on in heaven with the one true God.
Was I supposed to have a ministry of healing (spiritually or emotionally, ect.) ? Two years ago I would of said no now....
Am I a stronger person now ? Yes
Do I still get depressed and take it out on dumb things ? Yes (just ask the ops people) But I have learned to admit when I am wrong and ask forgiveness (again ask the ops).
I do believe God has plans for me an that humbling me and stopping MY PLANS was a part of it.
Is He done have I reached my goal ? I don't know I do know I was like Jonah and tried to do my will and He sent a fish to get me where He wanted (my fish as in the book of Jonah being a migraine).
Am I done growing ? No, both you and I will continue to grow and learn till we meet God in heaven.
Big lesson learned for me was the only real mistakes we make are the ones we don't learn from
Tank you for this post Amy it made me think I hope it was ok sharing my thoughts
Arashi aka Lynn
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (NKJV)
“Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.” Greg King
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Sstavix
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I think a big part of the problem is overthinking it. It comes down to trust - do you trust your Father in Heaven? Do you pray often and honestly? Are you receptive to the messages that He sends to you? Are you willing to do what He asks you to do, even if it makes no sense?

God won't steer you wrong. You just have to have the courage to ask Him what He wants, and listen carefully for the answer.
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Why do we have free will if God's plan is so specific?
I'm just going to venture out there and ask "Is it really that specific?" and propose "maybe it isn't." I don't disagree with a lot of what's said here but the "every moment, every interaction orchestrated by God Himself" train of thought never really made sense to me. I'd love to hear people's thoughts about it, though.
My name is ChickenSoup and I have several flavors in which you may be interested
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amyjo88
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Sstavix wrote:I think a big part of the problem is overthinking it. It comes down to trust - do you trust your Father in Heaven? Do you pray often and honestly? Are you receptive to the messages that He sends to you? Are you willing to do what He asks you to do, even if it makes no sense?

God won't steer you wrong. You just have to have the courage to ask Him what He wants, and listen carefully for the answer.
I think you're right SStavix, and I think that's why I struggled with this. I am an overthinker. Sometimes that's good, sometimes it stresses me out. :D

Storm - I swung the pendulum a bit far. Probably because the prevailing thought in my Christian circles when I was a teen was that God choose every single boyfriend you ever had and told you when to break up with them. We could also talk about saying that during a breakup.... "God doesn't want us to date anymore" isn't a great way to break up with someone.

I do think God has plans for our lives, just like Jeremiah 39:11. My point is, sometimes He leaves it up to us and we don't need to explain every choice we make with "God wants me to..."

Thanks for responding kindly peeps.

FYI, I am married and confident that we are in God's Will in our marriage and our lives.

Still more angles on this topic if anyone wants to jump in. :D

For example, Ephesians 1:11-14

In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.

If you keep reading, it sounds to me like "we" isn't referring to the Ephesians, but to Paul and his companions (the apostles?). Because later he says the Ephesians were also included and this seems to be based upon their hearing and believing.
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I always felt Ephesians 1:11-14 spoke of all believers, will have to re look at it.
I feel we have a lot of choices in life on our path and they have a impact on us. I do also feel many things are predestined and it is a mater of how we get there not if. I don't think every person I ever went out with was chosen ahead of time (God has better taste than that ) But would like to think the right one is chosen and hopefully we recognize it when we meet them.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
16 Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (NKJV)
“Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.” Greg King
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I agree with everything you've posted here. There's many outcomes, and so many loving people. With gods blessing you'll always end up with the relationships you talk about, a human that you can love with god. Theres many fish in the ocean.

Under the sea!!! lalala... J/k

Great post.
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