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Game Info:

South Park: The Stick of Truth
Developed by: Obsidian Entertainment
Published by: Ubisoft
Release Date: March 4, 2014
Available on: PC (reviewed), PS3, Xbox 360
Genre: RPG
Number of Players: Single-player
ESRB Rating: Mature 
Price: $59.99
(Amazon affiliate link)

Thank you Ubisoft for sending us this game to review!

In South Park: The Stick of Truth you start out as a new kid with a forgotten past.  Your parents encourage… no…wait, they pretty much force you to go out and make some new friends.  When you talk to people in this game, they may add you as a friend on their (virtual) Facebook page.  This is a good way to keep up on what’s going on in the small Colorado town.  

The first real friend your character meets is Butters who introduces you to king Cartman.  Cartman shows you around Kupa Keep and reveals his prized possession, the Stick of Truth.  It doesn’t take long before Kupa Keep is invaded by other kids dressed up as elves and they steal the stick.  

South Park: The Stick of Truth
Highlights:

Strong Points: True to the cartoon show
Weak Points: Some graphical glitches/ flickering
Moral Warnings: Extremely foul language, violence, sexual acts and nudity, drug and alcohol use, racism, gross humor 

It is during this scene that your character’s name and class is given.  No matter what name you type, you will be referred to as D-bag (spelled out) in the game.  The classes available are Fighter, Mage, Thief, and Jew.   When you hover over thief, Cartman says “Oh I never heard of a white thief before”.  Out of curiosity I played the Jew class.  My starting weapon was a staff and some of my unique powers include “Jew-Jitsu“ , “Circum-Scythe”, “Plagues of Egypt”,  and the “Sling of David” where I got to hurl a rock full of stones at my enemy.  Later in the game I earned a summon of the flamboyant Mr. Slave who sodomizes the enemies until they die.  There are three other summons that can be unlocked after completing some side quests.  One of these summons is Jesus if you successfully find him a few times.

There are plenty of side quests including the token “Getting rid of rats in a cellar.” You'll find multiple references to Elder Scrolls games; the hero is sometimes referred to as the dragon born and the fight music is clearly a mockery of Skyrim’s battle theme.  

The graphics are true to the South Park 2D style and have a lot of detail.  Sometimes there is way too much.  When I was in the police station I found a sketch of male genitalia.  It didn’t end there; as I was exploring the neighborhood I walked into houses where the owners were naked, masturbating or having sex (sometimes with animals).   

South Park: The Stick of Truth

Score Breakdown:
Higher is better
(10/10 is perfect)

Game Score - 86%
Gameplay - 17/20
Graphics - 8/10
Sound - 9/10
Stability - 4/5
Controls - 5/5

Morality Score - 0%
Violence - 0/10
Language - 0/10
Sexual Content - 0/10
Occult/Supernatural - 0/10
Cultural/Moral/Ethical - 0/10

This is obviously not a game to be played by or near children.  I would recommend wearing headphones as a courtesy since the language in this game is horrible. F-bombs are dropped repeatedly, including mother-f’er.  The Lord’s name is also blasphemed numerous times.

North America has an uncensored version of the game while Africa, Australia, Austria, Europe, Hong Kong, Singapore, and Taiwan have the abortion and anal probe minigames removed.  It’s pretty safe to say that this game succeeds in offending everyone.  Even people with AIDS and diabetes are made fun of.  

South Park: The Stick of Truth should only be played by adults who are fans of the show, and know what to expect.  Use extreme caution when playing this game around children as it contains harsh language and full frontal nudity. Anyone that is easily offended, grossed out with potty or sexual humor, or pretty much anything else should pass this title up. Also anyone, Christian or otherwise, who is unsure, please skip this game.

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Christ Centered Gamer looks at video games from two view points. We analyze games on a secular level which will break down a game based on its graphics, sound, stability and overall gaming experience. If you’re concerned about the family friendliness of a game, we have a separate moral score which looks at violence, language, sexual content, occult references and other ethical issues.

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